The Price of a Banana

I don't know if you know this, but Lubbock is a little sketch. It has some astounding per capita crime rate. If you're my mother or mother-in-law.... I should have added a better disclaimer. It's okay! I'm fine! My roommate's parents even bought us this fancy alarm system that I continually set off. I even got to have a nice chat with a quick responding police officer last week.  No officer, it's just me. The dumb roommate.

Last week I was briskly walking to my class which feels like the other end of the planet compared to my parking spot. I am always late so I was hustling. I noticed a man, an older gentleman sitting on a bench along my path with a lot of items with him. It was pretty clear that he had slept on that bench.

I went on about my day which ended around 8:00 p.m. A nice, short, 12 hour day. I was walking back to my car. Siva often walks me to my car at night just as added security measures. He's really just a good guy. Well it was about dusk and I was fine. I went to the computer lab and said my goodbyes. The rest of my lunch was sitting on the table and I thought about leaving it behind and just eating it tomorrow. I had a plum and I wasn't sure if I should leave it out all night out of the fridge. Thinking back that wasn't really logical thinking. The plum was in the open air when I bought it.... Anyway, I took it with me and thought I would reuse the paper bag to pack my lunch again the next day.

I walked back to my car and I noticed the man again. This time it made me a little nervous because I was all by myself on sort of a secluded street and all he had to do was ask me for my back pack and I would have been afraid enough to just hand it over. I wasn't so worried about my laptop in there as I was about my entire life for my comprehensive finals is on that computer. I just kept my face forward and went to my car. I started to feel a tug at my heart. I could hear (no not literally hear, but feel) God telling me, "Shanna, go give that man your lunch." I looked in my sack. I had a plum, a pack of mixed nuts, and a banana. A small bag of nutrition. I looked up at the man. He just sat there minding his own business. I second guessed myself, maybe he will be offended? No Shanna, go. I sat my stuff in the car and with keys and lunch in hand I walked up to the man. I said "Hello, did I see you here this morning?" he replied, "Yes, I was here this morning. I was told that I had to move my private property somewhere else. This is all my private property and they told me I had to move so now I am here." I just looked at him and said "Well, are you hungry?" He looked at me with no real change in his demeanor and said "Yes, I am always hungry." He wasn't sad, or pitiful, or pleading. Just matter of a fact.  Sort of like how people say "I could always eat." I handed over my bag and said, "Well here you go." He said "ooh a banana, that looks great. Thanks!" It was like we were friends. I wasn't condescending and he never acted desperate.

I walked away and called Matt and told him how fulfilled I felt by helping someone out. Although he never asked for my help. He may not have even needed my help. Whatever the circumstances were, this wasn't about having pity on someone. This was about listening.  The cost of the items in my bag was approximately $1.50. I've spent a lot of money on a lot of things, none of which made me feel as good as the feeling of listening to God. I felt whole. Whole in a way I haven't felt in a long time. If you know the feeling I'm talking about, then you know how great it is. If you don't, then maybe you need to take some time to listen. That's my problem, I don't always listen. Listening to God's instructions usually isn't easy. It's trusting in Him to lead you through what he calls you to do. Sometimes life gets uncomfortable, but that is how we grow.

This isn't a post about me telling you that I'm so great because I gave a guy a buck and a half of groceries. This is more of an admission that I need to do a better job of listening, and when I do I can feel that wonderful feeling of fulfillment in my actions which are driven by faith. I am happy nearly all the time, but feeling true joy, there's no feeling like it.

I was hustling to class again this morning. I saw the same man again (I hadn't seen him in a week). I said "Good morning, would you like my banana again?" His reply? "Yep."

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